possible reading (open mic) tonight which means, as usual, i am frantically combing through here for material
and in these moments i find it really easy to edit. to just toss whole chunks out
line after line
because it just doesn’t work.
it’s the immediacy, the rising panic of maybe someone will hear this, holy shit what if it’s terrible
and then the voice that says wait but it’s good but you want it to stay but you don’t need to change anything at all
just goes away. it’s absolutely quiet
and that, for all the anxiety of reading in front of maybe ten people, all of whom are awesome writers however, is totally worth the nerves. totally worth it.
because if i can start carving poems out of the stuff i write
then fuck yeah, that’s something to be proud of
that’s a step